


A Mother's Love

by imbadatusernames97



Category: Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Alec POV, Alec Talks To Maryse About Magnus, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, During COG, Emotional, Gen, M/M, Maryse Tries Her Best To Be A Good Mom, Mentions of Magnus, Mentions of Max, maryse pov, mentions of Jace
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-20
Updated: 2016-01-20
Packaged: 2018-05-15 05:36:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5773369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imbadatusernames97/pseuds/imbadatusernames97
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alec has been avoiding his parents since his kiss with Magnus during the Mortal War. He doesn't want to talk to them about it, but he knows he will eventually have to. The day of the victory celebration, Alec goes to the Penhallows to get something to wear for the party. While he's there, he runs into his mom and they have a talk. (Takes place during City of Glass, right before the victory celebration at the end of the book.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Mother's Love

The sun was just beginning to set on the city of Alicante as Alec Lightwood took his last few steps towards the Penhallow’s front door. He stood before the wooden surface for a moment, wondering If he should knock—it wasn’t his house after all, he was just a guest here—and ultimately deciding against it. Besides, even if he did knock, who would answer? Everyone would be too busy getting ready for the party. (And, truth be told, Alec did not want to draw any unnecessary attention to himself; he’d had enough attention to last himself a lifetime after his and Magnus’s kiss in the Accords Hall.)

  
Alec stepped inside of the house, closing the door quietly behind him. He looked around inside, a little surprised that everything looked just as it had the last time he’d left it. Alec wasn’t sure why he was surprised; the Penhallow home had been one of the few in the city undamaged by the Mortal War, he had known that. It was just that everything _felt_ so different now. How could anything have been left untouched by the week’s events?

  
When Alec had first arrived here in the middle of September, everything had been different: the Glass Towers were thought to be indestructible, he had still be convinced he was in love with Jace Herondale (Hell, Jace hadn’t even _been_ a Herondale back then; he had been a Morgenstern), he had been straight as far as his parents were concerned, and he had been an older brother to a happy, living child named Max Lightwood.

  
Now, though, none of those things could be said to be true. The Glass City was not as invulnerable as anyone had thought. Alec Lightwood was certainly not in love with Jace Herondale; his heart belonged to Magnus Bane and Magnus Bane only, of that he was sure. Jace was the biological son of Stephen and Celine Herondale, raised by Valentine Morgenstern, and loved by the Lightwood family. Alec’s parents were certainly aware of his relationship with Magnus Bane. Max was dead.

  
At the thought of Max, Alec flinched. That was a wound that was never going to heal, not really. Every minute of every day he and his family would be reminded of the sickening absence of their youngest member, stolen from this world far too soon. It would get easier, eventually, Alec knew. But eventually was not right now.

  
_Today is a happy day_ , Alec reminded himself firmly. _You are supposed to be celebrating your victory. You earned it. And it’s what Max would want for you._ With that in mind, Alec pushed all other thoughts of Max from his mind, resolving to deal with the pain another time.

  
The Shadowhunter started up the stairs, careful not to make too much sound. He could draw a Soundless rune, he reasoned, but it would be a little silly. As childish as it sounded, Alec had not come to see his family for the past two days. While everyone had been recovering from the battle, Alec had been avoiding his parents completely by hiding out with Magnus at Ragnor Fell’s old home in the countryside. Alec had attended Max’s funeral and shared a few words with his siblings, but then he’d left again with barely a look in his mother or father’s direction.

  
He just couldn’t bring himself to face them. Not yet. A part of him wanted to pretend that they still loved him, that he hadn’t disappointed and humiliated them in front of every Shadowhunter in the world. It had been different in the Accords Hall, when he had thought they were all going to die. Then, kissing Magnus had been a simple decision. Now, he wasn’t so sure.

  
The only reason Alec was even here today was because he had to get some clothes to wear to the party tonight. (That was, unless he wanted to wear some of Magnus’s clothes. He shuddered at the thought.) To Magnus’s credit, he had offered to zap some clothes from Alec’s closet at the Penhallow’s to Ragnor’s old house—the way he had done before Max’s funeral—but Alec had turned down the offer. Maybe, he thought, there was a part of him that wanted to run into his parents and get this over with.

  
Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad. As much as he was dreading the conversation he was going to have to eventually have, he didn’t really regret his and Magnus’s kiss. It was true that he probably wouldn’t have done it if he hadn’t been so sure he and Magnus were about to die. It was for the better that it had happened, though, Alec knew. It hadn’t been fair to Magnus to keep him a dirty little secret. It hadn’t been fair to himself to keep Magnus a dirty little secret, either. Even being as nervous as he was, Alec had never felt so light. Life had never felt so easy. It was like a literal weight had been lifted from his body.

  
Standing at the top of the stairs, Alec could see the door to the bedroom his parents had been given was half open. Warm torchlight spilled out into the hallway. There was no noise from inside, but that didn’t mean anything. Alec knew that if his parents were inside of the room they would very well be able to see him walk past on the way to his own room in the attic. If they saw him, they might want to talk to him.

  
With a determined sigh, Alec set forth. 


End file.
